To all the mothers out there in cyber space (and beyond), if there is one area in our lives that we can all relate to when it comes to our children it’s COMMUNICATION. If you’re the mother of an infant, (especially one that’s a crier) you long for the days when they can simply tell you what’s wrong. If you’re the mother of a toddler, (especially one who has temper tantrums) you wish they would use their words. However, if you’re the mother of a “drama tween” what then do you pray for?
First let’s define “drama tween.”
Well, we know that a “drama queen” is a person given too often excessively, emotional performances or reactions. Merriam-Webster definition.
“Tween” is a derivation of the word “between” which means, in an intermediate space or interval. The word “tween” means a boy or girl not yet thirteen years old. A “tween” can also be referred to as a “preteen”, according to Merriam-Webster.
Therefore, a “drama tween” is a boy or girl (usually a girl) not yet thirteen years old given too often excessively, emotional performances or reactions. In other words, any given situation, no matter how minor, has the potential to turn into a dramatic uproar. – MOTHERS BEWARE.
Next, let’s discuss some of the characteristics of a “drama tween.”
· If your tween has ever started a sentence with: Mo`THER…!
· If they use the word “like” in a sentence when it’s grammatically incorrect and/or they use the word “like” redundantly (5-7 times) in a single sentence.
· If they have destroyed the sacredness of short-hand. (i.e., ttyl, ttfn, bff, pofn, lol, lmbo, etc.)
· They tend to dress in colors that are bright enough to blind you.
· Tweens have the ability to hold a phone conversation for hours at a time.
· They often display the inability to control laughter.
· Most moms would agree that tweens are musically challenged.
· More often they are dependent upon visitations from swarms of friends (at any given time).
· Some tweens actually believe that money does grow on trees.
· An over abundance of lip gloss and bracelets.
How does a mom relate to her tweenager who seems to be living on another planet? Here are a few tips:
1. Communication. This is vital in your relationship with your tweenager. Talk to them till they are blue in the face. Exchange dialog with them. Share your thoughts with them, and ensure them your trust while reminding them that they can talk to you about anything. Don’t be their friend, they have plenty of those already however, they only have one mother.
2. Quality Time. Spend time with your tweenager. This is one of the most important times in a child’s life. They are in a between stage and looking for acceptance. Reassure them that at home, they are always accepted. Sow seeds of confidence and a healthy balance of self-esteem when talking with them.
3. Unconditional Love. Love your tweenager unconditionally. Everyone has the need to be loved, and your tween is no different. Show them love by talking with them, spending time with them, and especially when they make mistakes. There are always mistakes made in life, you made them as a tween so keep that in mind when your tween makes a mistake. None are perfect, but we should be teaching our tweens to strive for perfection.
These are just a few survival tips to help you in your effort to survive the “drama tween” experience. I would just like to offer one last bit of advice to my fellow mothers: When in doubt, don’t pout, pray. Prayer really does change things. However, it should not be used as a last resort. The scripture tells us to always pray and not faint. If your tween is easy breezy you’d better get a head start on praying for those teen years; I hear they can be pretty intense and the bottom line actually is – YOU AIN’T SEEN NOTHING YET.